What did I miss? Australia’s political week in fast-forward

Punters are sick of eating expensive nothing burgers cooked up by these two unoriginal placeholders. 

I missed most of the action while travelling and returned to a Covid re-run of politicians legislating around the edges of a logistical problem. Put it this way, if Labor ran a retail store they’d solve a missing box of stock by restricting trading hours and adding a surcharge to customers wearing shorts. They’d never find the box, but they could tell head office they were ‘doing something’.

Jim Chalmers is ‘doing something’. He’s scribbling ‘fuel crisis’ into the margins of his Budget reform package, nibbling a KitKat while the rest of us brace for new mortgage rates. He’s the only one working hard – and we really wish he’d take a break.

Angus Taylor and the Opposition barely noticed because they were too busy performing ‘last rites’ for the Victorian Liberals. Yes, Moira Deeming may yet keep her seat on the preselection ticket, but there’s a fair bit of blood and embarrassment on the partyroom floor while a few moderate powerbrokers can be heard chanting prayers in the shadows.

My latest edition of What did I miss? Australia's political week in fast-forward in The Spectator Australia.

The week where Anthony Albanese has taken his jerry cans to Asia to 'panic buy' fuel while telling the country 'not to panic'.

Meanwhile, Foreign Minister Penny Wong joins world leaders in their bid to 'talk' the Strait of Hormuz open and Donald Trump picks off what's left of… pic.twitter.com/u1wJYknv64

— The Spectator Australia (@SpectatorOz) April 3, 2026

Moira Deeming must move to One Nation

I can’t see how Moira Deeming can succeed now the rot has reached the Liberals’ core

From Macau: The Victorian Liberals have done it again, only this time the farce has played out in under 24 hours.

On Sunday, Liberal Party delegates in Melbourne’s west voted to dump sitting Upper House MP Moira Deeming from the top spot on preselection ticket. As Deeming did not run for any other spot, this means she would lose her seat at the state election later in the year.

Moderate-backed businessman Dinesh Gourisetty, a prominent figure in Melbourne’s Indian community, beat Deeming comfortably at 39 votes to 26. It was clinical. The moderates got their man. The conservatives got the message.

And then it all fell apart.

In the Unfiltered newsletter, Alexandra Marshall wrote:

I am going to contradict both my Editor-in-Chief and my Canberra Correspondent tonight. Let’s see how that goes…

The story of the Moira Deeming preselection and the factional wars going on inside the Victorian Liberal Party are, to quote a friend of mine, ‘The craziest shit I’ve seen in 45 years of Liberal Party politics.’

If you missed the story, you can catch up in our Flat White section – and the plot twists keep on coming. Even now, the story is changing.

My latest in The Spectator Australia, Moira Deeming must move to One Nation.

"She would be a star..." says Michael de Percy.

Western Metropolitan is tailor-made for One Nation. Working families crushed by energy prices. Migrants who came for opportunity, not ideology. Women who want their daughters to inherit the same rights they fought for.

Deeming… pic.twitter.com/xXypnneCVR

— The Spectator Australia (@SpectatorOz) March 30, 2026

What did I miss? Australia’s political week in fast-forward

The rolling fuel apocalypse is nothing to worry about, insisted the Minister for Panic Buying. 

This week turned out to be an Albanese Method™ masterclass. If there’s one superpower our Prime Minister possesses, it’s the god-like ability to set the house on fire, then burst through the smoke wearing a cape, yelling: ‘I’m here to save you!’

Meanwhile, the rest of us cough up billions in taxes to fund his superhero cape and the Uber that dropped him there.

Staff at the taxpayer-funded outrage factory known the AlBo fan Club went on strike. They’re demanding 10 per cent more of other people’s money to write feel-good propaganda for their comrades. ABC staff were spotted in uptown Ultimo wearing union t-shirts.

Dressing down for the drive from Mosman in their EVs must have been emotionally tough during a fuel crisis…

My latest in The Spectator Australia, What did I miss? Australia’s political week in fast-forward.

At least Aussie pubs 🍻 still have a sense of humour - they're raffling jerry cans instead of meat trays!!!

What did you miss this week?

International flights are being cancelled to save fuel, but we have been assured that the Toto Express is still ferrying ministers from… pic.twitter.com/tTh0nLkGyI

— The Spectator Australia (@SpectatorOz) March 28, 2026